Bachelor of Psychology

Started my course for the past 2 weeks.
Will update soon as I have just moved to Rawang.
Things haven't really settle yet.
Been busy helping mum as Chinese New Year is around the corner plus cleaning and shifting and buying furniture for the new house.
It really will takes us time to settle down.
Phew!! Got to go!!

Before and After...

Picture tells it all..

Before my eye surgery...
If you did realize, I don't have any eye lashes at my lower eye-lid.
That is because my lower eye-lid grows inward and my eye lashes was inside my eye, rubbing against my eye ball...

WARNING!!

If you haven't eat anything yet, I recommend you not to continue because the pictures after this is totally very disgusting.. I swear..!


Get a closer look...I have three types of stitches...
One is inside, that it will dissolved but itself, second stitch is at the middle and the one that you see is the outer stitches.
Each layer of stitches there is 6 of it, so all add up is 18 stitches..
By right, it is more than 18 because there are a few times the surgeon stitch wrongly and he have to take it out and do it all over again...

I'm BACK!!

I'm finally back..

First of all, I wanna thanks to all my friends who keeps calling me, SMS me, visit me and concern about me so much...
Thanks and thanks again..
Really heart touching...

My best friends, Sharon, Kai Kai, Jackie, Pueh Ling, Evon, Racheal, Shin Loong, Kim Qin, Pey Ying, Kelvin, Kevin, not forgetting, Shir Kee and others..

Family - Thanks aunty and uncle, grandpa and grandma, it is really heart touching when I know that you wants to rush down to take care of me, my cousins, specially for you, Jonathan, godsis and godbro...

College friends, Waise, Amy, Mechell, Flo, Evie, Yen..

Friends, (I can't list out here as there are so many of them)

Not forgetting, those in the chatbox...

Thanks so much you guys...
I'm sorry if I've missed out anyone, but I really do appreciate everything...

Thanks...

**huggs and love**

Tomorrow...

1st of December, Monday.
That is the day that I'm afraid of.
And it is tomorrow.
Only left a few more hours and I need to face the reality.
These few days, I tried hard to make myself busy.
So that I will not have extra time to think about the operation.
I went out with friends, spend time with them, helping my mum doing this and that,
When the night falls, make me more panic.
Cause, that is the time that I realize a day have just passed.
I have sleepless night,
Can't sleep well no matter how hard I tried.
Now only I know, how scared is uncle before his operation.
I'm having the same feeling here.
Maybe you are more scared, uncle.
But I feel the same too.
It is like a trauma, that hunts my mind.
It really makes me feel uneasy.
Don't asked me what am I afraid of as I can't explain the feeling.
It is the mixture of my feeling..
Scared, nervous, panic, and lots more..

I shall be away for these few days,
I might not come online and knowing what's happening and
I can't get update with you guys.
But I will make sure that my phone is always with me.
So that I can still update with you guys through sms and phone calls.
Only during my operation time, I need to completely switch off my phone.
That is on Monday, 1st Dec, at 8am till I guess 11-12pm as the operation will takes 2-3 hours.
After the operation, if I'm able to switch my phone on, I will do that.
I can't leave without my phone with me.
I must make sure that my phone is always with me.
Without it. I feel kinda weird.
Feel unsecured and most of all, feel sad I can't stay connected with dear dear.

Praying hard for my eye operation....

Tagged by Chell

Was tagged by Chell, but was too busy to do it till now... Hehe!!

1. what's the relationship of you and her/him ?

My friend during college days... College-mate + Classmate..

2. Your 5 impressions towards her/him ?

• - Always SMS
  
• - Intelligent
• - Very quiet
  
• - Adorable
• - Very hardworking
  

3. The most memorable things she/he have said to you

Those concerning words that she said to me when I'm down. (glad to have a friend like her.)

4. The most memorable things she/he had done for you

So far... When I'm sad, her concern is the most memorable things she have done to me.

5. If she/he became your lover, you will..

OMG... It is impossible!! We are not lesbian OK!! She have a loving bf and I have mine too..

6. If she/he become your enemy, you will...

There is no ''IF" coz we are friends and will be friends forever.

7. If she/he become your lover, she/he has to improve on..

Again, there is no "IF".

8. If she/he become your enemy, the reason is..

IF.... No reason la... coz she will not be my enemy

9. The most desirable thing to do on him/her is ?

Be there to support her and concern about her like she have done to me?

10. The overall impression of him/her is...

She is nice and sweet.

11. How do you think the people around you feel about you ?

Hope nothing bad.. If there is, then I apologize. Forgive me.

12. The character of you for yourself is ?

• Happy-go-lucky
• Quite emo at times
  
• Value my friends
  
• Very shy (Am I??)
  

I'm not perfect!

13. On contrary, the character you hate of yourself is ?

The lazy me, the way I made my bf unhappy.

14. The most ideal person that you wanna be is ?

No one, except myself

15. For the people who care about you and likes you, say something about them.

Thanks so much..! Appreciate it so much!!

Ten people to tag:

Anyone who wants to do it..!

So sorry Chell, for the late post.

Time flies...

It have been a month since uncle passed away.
Miss him so deeply here.
Time flies really fast.
All of us, already accepted the fact that uncle is no longer with us.
I wanna say thanks to those who support me and give me strength to move on.
Thanks so much and I do appreciate it so much.
I'm fine now.

Went to the eye specialist on Saturday and have my eye checked again before going for my eye surgery.
I'm suffering from lower eye-lid grow inwards instead of outwards.
The doctor said I was born with it and it is very common for chinese to have this problem.
The doctor gave 3 options,
Laser, surgery or plug off all my eye lashes.
The doctor said doing surgery is the best option as if laser, the chances to grow again, is big. If plug off all the eye lashes, it is only for temporarily.
December 1st is my surgery at 9am.
It will takes 1-2 hours.

I'm dead scared....

Friday, Oct 24, 2008. Rest in peace.

Woke up early this morning after hearing the house phone rang for a while till my maid pick it up.
Was wondering who is calling since it is just 6am.
Got the shocking news that my uncle passed away this morning at 12:30am.
We promised him that we will see him on Sunday and we asked him to wait for us.
But, we human can only plan and the decision is in God's hand.
God is much greater, He took uncle with him.
Uncle's last wish is so simple, he just want to see us one last time.
Now, he gone forever.
I miss him so much now.
Mum cried so much this morning, I was wordless.
These few days, I'm suffering from eye problem and I'm going to see eye specialist tomorrow.
Now, when ever my tear drip, my eyes is so pain.
But I can't stop crying after knowing that uncle is far away from us.
I really miss him so badly here.
He is a joker, that always make us laugh with his funny actions.
Now, all that become memories already.
I have no longer hear him joking, no longer hear him complaining, hear him talking and see him doing funny stuff.
He used to call me, "Uncle Kai Ca Bo Kia" (Uncle's daughter)
At times, he really pissed me off with his character and bad habits.
But most of the times, he really cheer me up.
Still remember when I've injured my leg and can't attend college lessons,
he dance while singing (Oh, Oh, Oh!!!! it is a kung fu fighting...) infront of me showing to me that he can dance with his leg while I can't.
Still remember how he changed my TV channel and how he criticized the actors and actress in my favourite movie.

Uncle, we really miss you and we always love you forever. Rest in peace.

To all my friends, if I promised you guys to go out with you all (yam char, watch movies, shopping, dinner and others), I'm so sorry that I have to break my promises. Right now, I really have no mood to do anything and I might be busy helping my families. For those who send me condolence, thanks for supporting me. I'm still strong here.
Thanks so much.

Dear, I tried my best not to cry, as you wish, I know my eye's condition, I will try, although it is hard. But most of the times, my tears drip uncontrollably. I have lost my uncle... I know you are here to support me. I do really need you.)

Hospital Sultan Ismail

Was so tired.
I have a hectic weekend.
As you know, uncle was admitted to the hospital about a week ago.
He is suffering from cancer stage four.
Actually after the operation, he stayed with us for about four months and then he decided to go back to hometown to stay with grandma.
For the whole four months, he is recovering and he is very active.
He talks, he walks, he eats, he plays and he even can drive to buy things for himself as he told us that he is bored staying at home doing nothing.
But when he went back to hometown in Batu Pahat, Johor, he is getting weaker and weaker.
He refuse to eat and drink.
To make the matter worst, one of my grandaunty from Singapore, she come and visit uncle.
That old lady, she so and tell uncle that his cancer is stage four.
We try to hide from him and she easily say it out.
Since that day, uncle have no mood and apparently lost his appetite over anything and everything.
He no longer can walk and now he is relying on the wheel chair to move around.

He was admitted to the hospital and now, we found out that his cancer cell is spreading in his body.
His cancer cell spread into his bone and attack his T-bone and other bone. He have no bone there and that was the cause why he can't walk.
Doctor told us that everyday, it is a bonus day for him.
I get that doctor message and we are now mentally prepared.
Doctor said that he now still can talk,
But he can fall into coma suddenly and he will leave us anytime.
I feel so useless whenever I saw my mum's tears dripping.
I wanted to comfort her, but I can't as my tears are dripping too.

Mum decides to go to Johor Bahru to visit uncle as he calls and begs us to go and visit us.
He said that he wants to see all of us before he leave us.
Saturday, after mum came back from her office, we pack and we make a move at around 3:30pm.
On the way, we have to stop by BP to fetch grandma up as she wants to visit her son too.
After so long journey, we fially reached JB and it tooks us about 6 hours plus.
We reached the hospital at about 9:45pm and because it is government hospital, they are very strict.
The visiting hours are like from 12:30pm till 2pm and from 4pm till 7pm.
When we reached there, we have to give 100 reasons to the security just to go in and visit uncle.
The security then allow us to go but only gives us 10minutes.
Well, of course we stayed more than 10 minutes and you know what happened?
That stupid malay security guard came in and scolded us, she told us times up. We begged for a little while more, this inconsiderate people just scolded us and off the room light and ask us out.
We wanted to scold her as uncle is staying in a VIP room and is a private room.
But we didn't afraid that she will do something harms uncle.

We then check-in hotel in Mutiara Hotel (formally known as Holiday Inn hotel).
Dad booked two rooms previously and we went up to rest for a while before we go for dinner.
We have our dinner at 11:45pm. I guess it is supper more than dinner.
But well, we are having seafood, it is satisfying after all.
Go back to the hotel room with bloated tummy, shower, rest, play and then at 3am, I fall asleep on the bed that I share with my sister. My grandma was in the next bed in the same room as me while my parent was in the next room.

At 10am, the next morning, all of us awake and shower and we get ready, go for breakfast and meet up with aunties from JB.
Luckily the hotel let us extend out check-out time till 3pm so that we are not that rushing.
We went to the hospital after breakfast and visit uncle.
We then went straight to the hotel and pack our belongings and check out.
We leave JB at about 3:15pm and we reached BP at 4:30pm.
Rest for a while in grandpa house, then we make a move back to KL at around 7:00pm.
Dad was speeding all the way and finally, we reached KL at 9:45pm.

I was so tired and restless.
All of us went to bed after shower.
I woke up today at 11:45am.
Still feel tired. But I have to help my mum to do some things.

This time, Flo tagged me... =)

RULE #1 People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
RULE #2 Tag 6 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse.These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

Tagged by Florentyna.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
~ I will make his life full will sorrow and misery.. Hahahaha!! (Serve him right!!)

2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
~ I wish that I will be a successful person in everything near future. (Yeah!! I'm scare of being a loser)

3. Whose butt would you like to kick?
~ My aunty's butt?? (Cause she con my mum money and didn't want to admit herself, but instead, put the blame on my uncle..)

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
~ Of course I will save it in the bank, give some for charity, then go around the world if I can and invest bla bla (As if the money is enough for everything)

5. Will you u fall in love with your best friend?
~ Hmm.... Let me think(thinking very deeply)... Of course. My bf is my best friend during my TAR College days.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
~ Of course being loved by someone as my family loves to tell us, choose the one that love you more than you love him. Haha!! My cousins always repeat that when we discuss bout our bf/gf.

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
~ It is all depends.. Well, if it is worth waiting, why not?

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
~ OMG!!! I will try to forget about him but still keep our friendship.

9. If you like to act with someone, who will it be? your gf/bf or an actress/actor?
~ I would like to choose actor (Raymond, Lam Fong). Why? Because, hey, how often you have the chance to act with an actor? I mean, we always have the chance to spend time with our bf right?

10. Will you invite for Ex bf/gf to your wedding dinner?
~ If he is still single, OF COURSE!! Let him feel regret of losing me. Hehehe!! If he is already married, I think I will invite him too cause to tell him that, hey, I'm more than ok without you as I have found a better one.

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?
~ 10 years time? Having a good career and a wonderful relationship. In short, success in everything.

12. What's your fear?
~ Fear?? Fear of being a loser? Fear of LIZARD!!! Hehe!!

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
~ People who don't know her, thinks that she is a shy and quiet person (this was what I think before I know her) But once you know her, she is friendly, good, nice and helpful person (I miss the three long hour break before our Business lecture in Sem 3 la Flo.)

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
~ I want to be rich, but I don't want to be single. So, can I have married AND rich? (hehe!! the greedy side of me)

15. What's the first thing you do when you wake up?
~ Is dear dear still on the line? Does the line hangs us up? If it does, I will call him again and if it doesn't, I will wake him up by keep calling for him. Hehe!!

16. Would you give all in a relationship?
~ I will give some (not all) at first and slowly, as time goes by, I will give it all.

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
~ Which two people? But if I fall in love with two people, I guess I will pick the one that is better than the other one and the one who loves me more.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done?
~ Well, hard to say(cause I'm quite a revengful type of person). Haha!! No la. It is all depends on how horrible is it (ya la, if that person make me lose my loved ones, how can I FORGIVE and FORGET). But mostly I might forgive, but NOT forget.

19.Do you prefer being single or having a relationship?
~ I guess in a relationship as I'm happy to be with my bf. Hehe!!!

20.List 6 people to tag (well, I'm going to change this question)
20. Who do you want to tag?
~ Anyone who are interested in doing this, they may. Hehe!!

!@%$@#@!

I'm so pissed off right now.
To other people, they think that I'm in the wrong.
But do you really check and understand my feelings?
I admit, I admit that sometimes I'm fierce.
But hey, please know the reason why I scold you.
Although I'm fierce, but of cause there is always a cause behind it.
I can't be so inconsiderate right?
That scolds you without any reason or purpose?
Please use your mind and think about it.

I don't understand,
Not sometimes, but always.
I don't really understand you.
So what if you are the sick person?
So what if you are my uncle?
Have you ever think, a deep thinking that why your son didn't ever bother to visit you?
Have you ever see your son buying things for you?
Hey, think yourself.

Yes, I did scold you.
I did raise my voice to you.
I did shout at you.
I'm pissed off at that time.
Know why?
Cause I have already been so patience with you and I can't take it anymore.
Hey, I'm human Okay!
I have a feeling.
I have already done my best, to be patience with you.
So, what somemore you want?
Doesn't this 4 months I did what you want?
Not enough? I'm telling you right now, that I have already been so patience with you for the past FOUR Months.
Hey. is four MONTHS ok, not four WEEK.
I don't like you? I hate you?
No, I don't.
But can you be not so childish?

The maid cooks EVERYMEAL everyday,
you refuse to eat it.
Giving so many excuses,
the food not nice, maid dirty, no taste, you don't like it, and anything that you can think off.
As a result, I need to go all way out just to buy the food that you want to eat.
I ned to buy for you for lunch and dinner.
I'm ok with it but hey, you want me to buy food from particular stall and place?
Isn't it a little too much?
I'm staying in Selayang and you want me to go all the way to Cheras to buy Nasi Lemak for you?
Go to Imbi and buy mee for you?
At night when I'm dead tired after the whole day out, you wants me to go to Pudu and buy you dinner.
Hey, that is way too much.
Can you look at the time, what time is it? It is already 11pm.
Forgive you with the food problem as mummy always told me that bear with you and actually, I'm very happy to see you have appetite to eat.

What I don't really like is...
The day that you need to go to the hospital for check ups.
Hey the appointment have already made.
Mummy asked me to send you there as she have to work.
I remembered before I drive, I asked you where else you want to go, didn't I?
You told me that you have nowhere to go.
And I asked you are you sure because I don't want to make a big turn later.
You said after the checkup you wants to go back your house to take somethings.
I said ok and then you say thats all.
Hey, I drive till we reach right infront of the hospital and you asked me don't go to the hospital first.
Asked me to send you to the bank and you wants to redraw money.
I'm fine with it. Although I'm angry, but I didn't show it.
You told me to drive you to the bank.
I did as what you said. But wait a minute..
To redraw money from ATM machine, do you need to go back to your house area that bank?
You know it is so far away from the hospital?
And I need to go all the way just for you.
Then you say can go to the hospital already.
I did as you asked.
Reach hospital, you go for your checkup.
Then you asked me to send you back to your house.
You know?
I'm so pissed off as it is far away from the hospital and I need to go there again.
Why just now you don't want to go as we are already there when you want to go to the bank?
Why you wants me to go there twice?
I have been driving since morning till evening 6pm.
You know how tired am I?
How hungry am I?
I'm fine with it.
You saw the mangosteen stall near your house, you told me to drop by afterward.
Honestly, I forget about it.
I totally forget about it.
After I turn out heading home, already half the journey only you remind me.
What you want me to do?
It is already half the journey and I need to send my sister for tuition later.
It is so rushing. You stayed with us for so long, don't you know that Jasmine's tuition everynight?
I told you that I go to the night market and buy it for you later.
Mummy did buy it and what did you do?
You throw off all the mangosteen by saying it is rotten.
But it is actually not at all.
I keep it by myself again.

That day, is the day where I can't take it anymore.
The day I scold you and raise my voice to you.
I can't take it anymore.
Because of your character.
Your bad behaviour.
If you don't know how to fix that pond,
DON'T fix it.
No need you to act so pro to adjust and do the statue for the pond.
You know mummy spends so much to buy that statue and now you broke it.
I have already told you earlier on,
That don't do it.
Let it be and you said that you know how to do and you always did that.
Fine!! Now, what have you done with it?
You broke it.
I was so pissed off and I raise my voice and scold you.
Cause that is mum's favourite.
You know.
Now???

I scold you for a reason and I already can't take it.
There are so much more that I don't want to point it out.
You are so selfish.
You watch your program and you don't let us change to the channel that we want to watch.
I missed out so many episode because of you.

All I know, I only scold you once.
Only that one time.
What you did?
You tell all my aunties that I have no manners?
They don't even know what really happens.
So, you think that you are only one who are right and I'm wrong?
You make yourself so innocent and make me feel so guilty.

Trust me, I will repay back.